Retreat

Ok, so things have changed since my last post.

Don't get me wrong, this is still a really weird experience. But, I've changed my reason for being here.

No longer the selfless Summer I had had in mind, I am now here for my own future employment progression. (Basically the reference and CV points). And being here for that reason makes it OK that I spend my days here writing reports.

I'm trying to ditch all the negativity and focus on the positives. I'm sleeping for eight hours every night, drinking two green teas a day (albeit with spoonfuls of sugar in) and consuming loads of vegetables. It's like a health retreat!

And the other day I did something kind of cool. A couple of volunteers have been planning English lessons for Khmer children on Sunday's. But when child after child (as well as a few monks) wondered in, we started to realise that more then a couple of volunteers were needed. I found myself sitting with a group of Khmer children looking at me, expectantly waiting.

But, who needs lesson plans when you've got spontaneity? And so I began...

A, B, C, D, E, F, G....

And I have to say, it was quite a success. I'm even considering teaching as something I could do in the future. Or maybe it was just a one off thing (most likely).

I'm immersed in the culture here. The only thing I can't quite come to terms with is the food. Vegetarianism just isn't an understood concept. I remember when I first met my host family, they said 'fish or meat.' When I replied with neither, they simply stared at me for an awkward second or two and repeated 'fish or meat.'

But yesterday we went to town, and I filled up on pizza, chips and three chocolate milkshakes, piling back on the pounds I'm loosing through constant bowls of rice and carrots.

It's not so bad here. Believe me, I still have my down days. I just no longer have my days of frantically checking for the price of flights home.

Six more weeks to go.

I'm finding out a lot about myself here. It's hard not too when constant self reflection is embedded in the programme. I'm either going to go back to the UK a lot more secure as a person, or extremely bored of myself. I'm also going to go back to the UK extremely happy for a change of scenery. Don't get me wrong, it's beautiful here, but we only leave the village for a few hours every week. When people ask to see pictures of my stay it'll be:

'Here's the river, and here's the river again.....and this is the river from another angle....and here's a cat next to the river.'

Being surrounded by so much nature is energising though. I don't miss the constant grey of London. The never ending concrete of buildings, and paths and roads, making street after street after street a constant blur. It's not good for the soul. It's refreshing to be constantly walking on mud, and riding among the green and to share my bedroom with both geckos and mice (when they're not eating my clothes). It's uplifting. Like a permanent camping trip.

So there you go. Volunteering in Cambodia: my spiritual health retreat.